A cold January invites endless speculation about the nation-stopping Elfstedentocht (Eleven Cities Race), a gruelling 200km (124mi) skating marathon though the countryside of Friesland. The last one was held in 1997, and it could be decades before it all freezes over again. Carnaval in February is an excuse for silly costumes and revelling celebrated mostly in the Catholic south. Koninginnedag (Queen’s Day) is on April 30 and is a huge party day in Amsterdam. The whole central city becomes a huge street market/party where anyone can sell whatever they like - it’s a madhouse. The Holland Festival in June is celebrated mostly in Amsterdam and The Hague. It’s often highbrow and pretentious but there are many fringe events. The Hague’s North Sea Jazz Festival each July is the world’s biggest jazz junket.

Vying for attention as Holland’s oldest city, Nijmegen attracts revellers from all over for the country’s hugest walking festival. The Vierdaagse (Four Day March) over 200km (124mi) through the surrounding countryside is a major event for serious walkers and partygoers alike, starting on the third Tuesday in July. The event is ushered in and drawn to a close by the Zomerfeesten (Summer Festival), which begins on the Saturday before Vierdaagse.

Sinterklaas (Saint Nicholas) is the white-bearded patron saint of children who arrives ‘from Spain’ in mid-November. He is accompanied by a host of mischievous servants called Zwarte Pieten (Black Peters). On the evening of 5 December, people give one another anonymous and creatively wrapped gifts accompanied by poems about the recipient, written by Sinterklaas. The Dutch sensibly have two Christmas Days (on 25 and 26 December), which is handy for in-laws. Fireworks are only allowed to be sold in the days preceding New Year’s Eve - there are hundreds of injuries each drunken, crackin’, bangin’ 31 December.